Gay men and women

My Husband’s Not Gay, a show on TLC, has caused an uproar. I’ve heard more than once, “I’m not gay. They don’t have to live their lives so that the people around them are comfortable.

[The study] shows that it's something that people are born with."

Previous studies have examined brain differences between gay and straight people on the basis of their responses to various tasks, such as rating the attractiveness of other people. Or at least, not in the sense of getting-married-having-babies-with-side-by-side-burial-plots type of Ones.

His explanation also makes me feel extra-very special, so obviously I’m on board. An agreement not to bolt may be very helpful.

The big question is: How can a gay man affirm his identity with other gay men and at the same time remain true to his wife? They often don’t know their identity is gay when they first come to see me. If your husband says he didn’t know he was gay when he married you, he most likely didn’t know. Most of my male clients who are gay and married to women didn’t know that their identity was gay when they married.

They scanned subjects' brains when they at rest and did not show them photos or introduce other behavior that might have been learned.

They found that in gay men and women, the blood flowed to areas involved in fear and anxiety, whereas in straight men and lesbians it tended to flow to pockets linked to aggression.

Robert Epstein, emeritus director of the Cambridge Center for Behavioral Studies in Concord, Mass., agrees that the study offers compelling evidence that sexual orientation is a biologically fixed characteristic.

She may fear that because he is gay, he will leave her. I hope it does that for you, too.

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So I’m nervous to inadvertently fan the flames of scary anti-queer rhetoric.

That is, the man is still gay, and he loves you.

3. The couple may need to be in therapy to deal with the stress.

Despite the difficulties, I still counsel couples who consider staying together if this is what they want, to preserve the love that brought them together in the first place. What does she need? Fortunately, Oliver had the benefit of my feminist Orgasm Gap rants over the past five years, and took to the task of making me come with admirable tenacity.

I warn them also that she may want more from a marriage than he can offer over time as well.

Both the gay man and the straight spouse share the risk of staying married. They found that the straight men and gay women had asymmetrical brains; that is, the cerebrum (the largest part of the brain, which is responsible for thought, sensory processing, movement and planning) was larger on the right hemisphere of the brain than on the left.

Marriage itself isn’t easy. Will the couple decide that he must remain traditionally faithful; or will they have a more open marriage, and if so, under what mutually agreed-upon rules?